18 12 2007
I don’t even know if I’ll finish Sunny’s birthday drawing. I doubt he’d want a painting of me & him. Even if we are friends, who’d want something like that hanging up or sitting behind a desk or whatever… Something with my face on it. I’d be better off painting him alone or something. However, the void created without me in the picture would be too big and it probably wouldn’t be right.
Ha, that sounded like it had a double meaning.
Things would probably be better without me in the picture.
I’m barely in the picture as is. With any luck, I’ll just fade away.
Just like dust, blown away over the edge.
I feel so incredibly unattractive, and it’s true. I truly am. My mother subtly tells me when she looks at me with a look of disdain upon her face.
I’m like Crinkly the Swan. {http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30200-1297008,00.html?f=rss} Maybe someday, just like Crinkly, I’ll find something worth it all. OR perhaps, I already have (in the form of: ART) and I just need to accept it.
C’est la vie.
